That Parent Figure.

I don't have any children. I am not married. It doesn't mean that I cannot be a motherly figure. A parent is involved in all aspects of child's life: physical development, personal, educational, mental, emotional, spiritual, and so much more. Parents have the greatest responsibility--to raise another human being.



One of my closest friends has two children. Her husband is healthy and physically strong. She is in a wheelchair. I admire her a lot. Having physical challenge, she have spent most of her life in a wheelchair. She managed to be a cornerstone of her family. Moreover, she gave birth to two awesome girls.
We have a bit of age difference, but it doesn't affect our friendship.
Her youngest daughter, who just turned ten, always gives me hugs. She leans against me like daughter against mother. We talk and laugh. We ride the bus and going for walks. I walk while she rides her bike.
Sometimes people mistake me for her mother. If it were so, I would have given birth at the age of sixteen.
We share laughs. She tells me secrets that a ten year old girl needs to tell someone. We joke and laugh. She runs to me whenever I come over for a visit.
I don't remember how much time we spent on a playground. We were there in different seasons: Spring, summer--you name it.
I can truly say that I love this girl in a way I  would love a daughter. And as a figure of motherly role I want her to know few things. I am not going to talk about listen to the parents. She knows well.

People will hurt you

Some more than others--some a little bit, but some much!! I wish I could stop that, but I can't. We all have to suffer the pain, because we all live in a fallen world. Sometimes people who love us the most will also hurt us the most. 

Quite often hurt is unexpected. People hurt us for various reasons: malice, envy, revenge, ignorance, self-entitlement, selfishness, low self-esteem, personal gain, and sometimes unintentionally. Betrayal is the worst hurt.
You see, my girl, I am not exempted from hurting you. not because I want, but because I am a sinner.  I promise I am trying to be the best person I can, but I will fail miserably without God's help.
Don't let fear to to stop you from interacting with other people.
As much as others can  hurt you, you can hurt others. It's because we have sinful nature. You will hurt others whether intentionally or unintentionally. Sometimes our pain blinds us to the the point where we start hurting others.
If you let your hurt to take over your life, it will. Trust e you don't want grudge control your life.

Don't let money to ruin your life

Money can ruin your life. Not having enough--poverty; having to much--greed and self-indulgence. Poverty leads to despair in many cases. Poor people become easy target to trafficking and other forms of evil. Poverty befriends despair. Poverty can harm in many ways.
Don't think that wealth doesn't bring any problems. Rich people have to worry about investments, money safety, and other money related problems. Many people try to become friends with wealthy people because of their wealth. You see, wen people love money they will focus their energy on obtaining money, sacrificing human dignity, time with their loved once, other people--I have seen cases where people were blackmailing leading to destroying individuals and families-- are so much obsessed with money that they will do anything to obtain it.

The love of money is the root of all evil

Please remember the quote above. Stay away from debt. Too many people live beyond their means. They have large houses, corvettes, but also large debts.

Awe of Appearance

This world is obsessed with looks. You open a magazine and see perfectly looking models. Most of those pictures are taken under certain light. Models wear a lot of makeup. Special team of people edits pictures. Most of the time you see distorted reality in those pictures.
We need to stay healthy. Eat healthy to our best possibility, Keep our personal hygiene--take shower/bath wash our hair, brush teeth, brush our hear and so on. Healthy weight supports healthy body.
Don't obsess with clothes jewelry, gadgets, and other objects.  You don't need to have the latest brand. You parents are doing such an amazing job to raise you up.
You are beautiful just the way you are. Imagine if we all looked the same--the world will be the most boring place ever.

Comparison stills joy

My dear girl, please don't compare yourself to others. You are not like them. They are not like you.Just because one of your friends has a new bike, doesn't mean that they are happy. You don't know what she is going through behind closed doors.

You have people in whose arms you can run whenever you need someone to catch you. I an honored to be one of those people.

Do the best you can; be the best person you can be.

Have common sense

Don't be gullible. Know people you can trust. Be careful during dating period. You need to be especially careful  whom you let in your life; whom you share your secrets,
Common sense will save you from many dangerous situations, even save your life. Don't let a person make you do something that is dangerous and risky. Develop your intuition. Trust me it will help you to discern.
Common sense is also good while trying to make decisions on day to day basis.
I have seen common sense in you. Just keep it going.

Don't pursue people who don't want you

There people whose attention, company, affection, and love you crave. Unfortunately, they are not responding back. In some cases they will talk to you with that... lukewarm voice. They treat you nice but there is ice that you feel beneath the surface. You give them your time and gifts. They accept it, but when you want to spend time with them--they cannot. In some cases people are really busy. However, they still make an effort to give you a time.
Meanwhile, there are people who need you, who value and appreciate you. I neglected those people in order to pursue those who don't want me. This is one of my biggest regrets. By chasing (not literally) I ended up hurting myself and people who care for me.

Look beyond

Often things are not what they seem. Some of my most interesting conversations I had with homeless people. Look at every person as a human being, beyond their situation, appearance, and status. 

Our situation often work out the way we do not expect it to happen. Your situation and behavior affect more people than you think. A simple act may reverberate in eternity. 

People will judge you

No matter what you do, people will judge you. They will often present judgement as 'good criticism', but they will attack you, not your actions. It's easier to distinguish them as time goes by, because you are not the only person they will attack. 

The worst one are backbiters those can harm you. I have encountered those. They will get you in trouble that can cost you. 

You cannot please everybody. Stay away from the drama and gossiping, it's a waste of time.

Be true to yourself

Because if you don't stay true to who you really are, you will be influenced by so many lies. People will manipulate you. And one day you'll ask yourself who are you?
You are not defined by what other people see in you, but by how God sees you.
You see, we are all equal in God's eyes, whether rich or poor, male or female.

Pursue God

My dear girl, pursuing God will meet all of your needs. It will give you more than you can ever imagine. I was so delighted to learn that you believe that "Jesus died n the cross for our sins"
What joy it was to share the message of salvation with you few years ago.
Whenever I ask you you say that you believe in Jesus. I pray that your faith will grow.
Remember that the Lord has great plan for your life.

I love you the way I would love my own daughgter