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Saturday, November 21, 2015

When the Hate Finds the Gate...

Hate towards other people...

Everyone has a capacity to hate others. But hate can slowly poison your life. Many times it enters our hearts discreetly.  We might even miss the moment.
I used to hate a few people. By God's grace, I don't hate them anymore. A heart free of hatred is one of the best gifts.
The hate came into my life when I was young--around the age of nine, it might have been earlier, but it manifested itself when I was nine years old.

The manifestation

The hate doesn't manifest itself in the same way all the time. Sometimes it was so subtle, it seemed as if there was no hate.Other times it just out there in its full manifestation. Just because hatred doesn't manifest it doesn't indicate the absence. Usually, it starts to show in small ways.

  1. Constant desire to avoid someone 
  2. Constantly criticizing the person
  3. When something goes wrong with a person and the immediate response--well they brought it upon themselves
  4. When you end up in the room with someone whom "you can't stand". You will talk to others but not to that individual. 
  5. When you have to talk to that person, you make it is the shortest conversation possible
  6. Indifference to the suffering of others
  7. You wish something bad will happen to that individual
  8. You become glad when something bad does happen
  9. You want to get "even" with the individual 
  10. When somebody points out that you might have a problem with the individual, you get all defensive-- from 'this is none of your business' to "get out, you have no idea what's going on"
If we don't take care of the hatred, it will spread all over our lives. It will affect the relationships with others, our behavior, and other life aspects.
Just because we are good at showing good side outwards, doesn't mean that there is no hatred inside. We have to examine our hearts constantly. Hatred feeds on our ego, pride, and fear. 

Hate leaves the heart

At some point, I realized that I couldn't go like that. But it's much harder t get rid of the hate. It took years, many tears and heartbreaks. You see--hate debilitates the ability to love. Sometimes I wonder, what would have been if there were no hate? It would have been better. However, our past cannot be undone. I still have few scars from the hatred. I am still in the process of healing. The medicine I a taking is forgiveness. When someone offends us, they offend God first and foremost. If God forgives, we ought as well.

Paris tragedy

My heart goes to France. The attacks that happened--not just in Paris, but all over the world-- is the result of the hatred. The world is watching how we as Christians will respond. If we respond with hate, we will give haters more excuses to hate us. If we respond with love, we will debunk their tactics.
 They wouldn't be able to blame us for the hatred.
Now is the time when church can shine the light into darkness.  


  1. When I watch News film telling tragedic incidents,I have to watch out myself.Because I know that I am easy to feel angry.First step to hatred is often anger,I think.

    My heart goes to France,too. Many believers are praying for France now.It is often said that French people already lost their faith in God.But we know that there are many devoted believers are still there.I know that christianity in France never die and God loves the people.

    Even before I became a christian,I read biography of French believers,impressed by their lives.Thank you for insightful post. And let's keep on pray for this country.


    1. Sanae, I agree with you. Lingering anger can produce hatred. I know it from my personal experience. It makes me happy to see that there are believers in France.

      Let us always pray for oe another,

  2. "My heart goes to France. The attacks that happened--not just in Paris, but all over the world-- is the result of the hatred. The world is watching how we as Christians will respond. If we respond with hate, we will give haters more excuses to hate us. If we respond with love, we will debunk their tactics. " Amen.

    Dear Irina,
    Thank you so much for this insightful and thought-provoking post. Actually, while I was reading, the Holy Spirit convicted me and showed me a certain person (one of my relatives who has been harsh to my faith), whom,,,,I confess to you,,I dislike. So, I'd like to pray and confess this sin in front of Him and in front of you.

    Father, thanks to Irina's post, I realized that I still have a bitter heart toward A. Please forgive me. Help me to forget about what he's told me. Help me to crucifiy my fleshly reaction on the cross. Help me to think of A with Your love. I thank Thee for my precious friend and sister Irina. You know how much I love her. Please bless her life in Canada. Bless all her family and relatives in Russia. In Jesus' name. Amen.


    1. Dear Kinuko,
      Thank you for your bravery and courage. It's hard when you family does't aproof of your faith. I am in a similar situation.
      Hate is dangerous in so many ways. Hatred will not remain in a single area of our lives. We might think that we have it under control, but it's just like a poison--will spread all over our lives.
      Your confession made me think a lot! I am going to send you an e-mail in a few days.

  3. Dear Irina,
    Your post has touched my heart. It is so true that, in my case, people have hurt me, and I react with avoidance at first, dislike, and growing bitter toward that group of people. I think it can be even worse when those people profess to be Christians. I know God doesn't want that to happen, but sometimes I feel powerless to stop it.
    This summer, my daughter and I went to a summer, Christian camp, she as a camper and myself as kitchen help. I didn't know that this group of people would be down there serving as well. Being there with them took me right back to the time 5 years previous where they had caused so much hurt and pain for so many people. The one thing that stuck in my mind was one comment that had been made by the staff director. 'It is no accident that God has brought all of you together to work at camp this week.' I went through much inner turmoil and many many tears, but finally, I am free of the hate that I had for these people, praise the Lord! I made a friend of one of them as I had to work closely with her. I was able to talk with others of them as I came into contact with them. God dealt with me there, and even if those people harbor any ill will toward me, it's ok because I know I can love them through Christ.
    That doesn't mean that my memories of that day are forgotten. Like you said, the scars remain, but what it does mean for me is that Satan no longer has the stronghold in that area of my life. I need to do the same with others that have hurt me too, but it's not easy. God has proved to me, though, that I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. Thank you so much for this post!
    Your sister in Christ,

    1. Dear Ruthie, thank yo for sharing. Sometimes we might think that the things are all right between us and the other individual(s) until we see each other in person.
      That was God's divine plan that the Lord brought you together. I also think its great that you will have memories about what happened in the bast, because when you will need to forgive again, you will have a template on how to forgive.
      God bless you,